A Lot
About It
Absolutely Not
Accidental Success
ACTIVE
Actively Disengaging
Actually I Am
Actually, I can't even today
Adulting is not going well today
Again
Against My Better Judgment
Alexa, start my car
ALL GOOD
ALL SET
Allergic To Mornings
Allergic To Responsibility
Almost Accurate
Almost Certain
Almost Logical
Almost Ready
Almost Smart
Almost Thoughtful
Already
Already Over It
Always
And Expectations
And I Noticed
And No Regrets
And Patience
And Then Some
And Underperforming
And Underwhelmed
Annoyed Professionally
Answers Pending
Ask Me Later
Assumed Correct
Assumed It Worked
Assumed Knowledge
Assumed Knowledge Present
Assumed Outcome
Assumed Permission
Assumed Success
Assuming Good Intent
Assuming It Works
Assuming No One Notices
Auto Pilot
AWAKE
AWARE
Baby on board (just kidding, it's vodka)
Background NPC
Bad Decisions
Bad Decisions AF
Bad Decisions Ahead
Bad Decisions Club
Bad Decisions Daily
Bad Decisions Life
Bad Decisions Vibes
Bad Vibes
Bare Minimum
Bare Minimum Achieved
Bare Minimum Club
Bare Minimum Energy
Bare Minimum Personality
Barely
Barely Alive
Barely Alive Today
Barely Awake
Barely Awake Club
Barely Awake Mode
Barely Awake, Again
Barely Awake-ish
Barely Brain Brewing Definitely
Barely Caution Pending Mostly
Barely Chaos
Barely Chaos Crashing Again
Barely Chaos Expired
Barely Civil
Barely Coping
Barely Drama
Barely Energy
Barely Energy Eventually
Barely Energy Offline Forever
Barely Energy Spiraling
Barely Existential Crisis Suspended
Barely Focused
Barely Function Now
Barely Functional
Barely Functional Today
Barely Functioning
Barely Functioning Hero
Barely Functioning Mode
Barely Functioning Nicely
Barely Functioning, Nicely
Barely Holding It
Barely Holding It Together
Barely Human
Barely Inner Child Brewing Sometimes
Barely Inner Child Overdrafted Always
Barely Logical
Barely Mind
Barely Mind Rising
Barely Mind Spiraling Mostly
Barely Mood Crashing Sometimes
Barely Mood Glitching Seriously
Barely Motivated
Barely Moving
Barely Nap Pending Seriously
Barely Overthinking Lagging
Barely Overthinking Malfunctioning
Barely Reasoned
Barely Sleep Glitching Forever
Barely Sleep Now
Barely Soft Chaos Brewing Seriously
Barely Surviving
Barely Surviving Again
Barely There
Barely Thriving
Barely Tolerating
Barely Trying
Barely Vibe Rising Always
Based on a Hunch
Based on Experience
Based on Nothing
BASIC
BE KIND
BE NICE
Best Guess Wins
Best I Could Do
Bite Me
Bite Me Alert
Bite Me Forever
Blame Society
Blame the car, not the driver
Blame traffic, not me
Brain At Rest
Brain Buffering
Brain Fog
Brain Fog Active
Brain Fried
Brain Full
Brain Lag
Brain Loading Slowly
Brain Loading…
Brain Malfunction 2
Brain Malfunctioning
Brain Needs Coffee
Brain Needs Update
Brain Not Included
Brain Offline
Brain On Hold
Brain On Vacation
Brain Overdrive
Brain Quiet
Brain Rest
Brain Slow
Brain Static
Brain Tired
Brain: Loading…
Brain: Offline
Brainstorm Lite
Brainstorm Ongoing
Brake first, think later
Brake for sarcasm only
BUFFERING
Built Different
Built Tired
But It’s Not
But Quiet
By Anything
By Effort
Bye
Caffeinated Morally
Caffeinated Soul
Caffeine Hero
Caffeine Optional
Caffeine Overdose
Caffeine Overlord
Caffeine Required
Caffeine Required Always
Caffeine Required Now
CALM
Calm Attempt
Calm Chaos
Calm State
Calm-ish
Can’t Deal
Can’t Even
Cancel Everything
Cancel Everything Alert
Cancel Everything Forever
Cancel My Plans
Casual Chaos
Casual Survival
Casually Lost
Casually Spiraling
Caution AF
Caution Daily
Caution Hot
Caution Hot AF
Caution Life
Caution Mood
Caution Required
Caution: Driver caffeinated beyond recommended limits
Caution: Driver experiencing life in hard mode
Caution: Driver experiencing technical and emotional difficulties
Caution: Driver experiencing technical difficulties (all of them)
Caution: Driver experiencing technical difficulties (emotionally and mechanically)
Caution: Driver fueled by audacity
Caution: Driver may be crying
Caution: Driver may be dissociating as a hobby
Caution: Driver may be dissociating as a lifestyle choice
Caution: Driver may be dissociating as a permanent lifestyle
Caution: Driver may be dissociating as self-care
Caution: Driver may be dissociating at 60mph
Caution: Driver may be dissociating through life permanently
Caution: Driver may be dissociating through responsibilities
Caution: Driver may be dissociating through responsibilities as self-care
Caution: Driver may be dissociating through this and every other experience
Caution: Driver may be dissociating through this commute
Caution: Driver may be dissociating through this entire drive
Caution: Driver may be dissociating through this entire existence
Caution: Driver may be experiencing a permanent existential crisis
Caution: Driver may be experiencing a permanent Monday
Caution: Driver may be experiencing all emotions or complete dissociation
Caution: Driver may be experiencing all five stages of grief
Caution: Driver may be experiencing all stages of grief simultaneously
Caution: Driver may be experiencing an identity crisis
Caution: Driver may be experiencing an internal monologue externally
Caution: Driver may be experiencing an out-of-body experience
Caution: Driver may be experiencing an out-of-body-and-mind experience
Caution: Driver may be experiencing every emotion or complete numbness
Caution: Driver may be experiencing every emotion or none
Caution: Driver may be experiencing every emotion simultaneously
Caution: Driver may be experiencing existential dread
Caution: Driver may be experiencing life on hard mode permanently
Caution: Driver may be experiencing Monday (any day)
Caution: Driver may be experiencing permanent technical difficulties
Caution: Driver may be experiencing technical difficulties
Caution: Driver may be experiencing technical difficulties (emotionally)
Caution: Driver may be feral
Caution: Driver may be having a moment
Caution: Driver may be held together by caffeine
Caution: Driver may be held together by caffeine and existential dread
Caution: Driver may be held together by coffee and questionable decisions
Caution: Driver may be held together by dry shampoo
Caution: Driver may be held together by dry shampoo and denial
Caution: Driver may be held together by spite and dry shampoo
Caution: Driver may be one bad day away from everything
Caution: Driver may be one inconvenience away from a breakdown
Caution: Driver may be one inconvenience from a complete personality change
Caution: Driver may be one inconvenience from a villain arc
Caution: Driver may be one inconvenience from becoming unhinged
Caution: Driver may be one inconvenience from snapping
Caution: Driver may be one minor inconvenience from becoming a headline
Caution: Driver may be one minor inconvenience from chaos
Caution: Driver may be one minor setback from chaos
Caution: Driver may be one minor setback from main villain era
Caution: Driver may be one parking ticket away from a meltdown
Caution: Driver may be one traffic jam from a breakdown
Caution: Driver may be powered by pure audacity
Caution: Driver may be powered by pure audacity and poor decisions
Caution: Driver may be powered by pure chaos energy
Caution: Driver may be powered by pure rage
Caution: Driver may be powered by unresolved childhood issues
Caution: Driver may be powered by unresolved everything
Caution: Driver may be powered by unresolved issues
Caution: Driver may be running on 2 hours of sleep
Caution: Driver may be running on autopilot
Caution: Driver may be running on fumes and delusion
Caution: Driver may be running on fumes, delusions, and yesterday's coffee
Caution: Driver may be running on hopes and Red Bull
Caution: Driver may be running on hopes, dreams, and expired coupons
Caution: Driver may be running on pure spite alone
Caution: Driver may be running on pure spite and iced coffee
Caution: Driver may be running on pure spite and iced lattes
Caution: Driver may be running on spite, caffeine, and poor decisions
Caution: Driver may be running on vibes alone
Caution: Driver may be running on vibes and prayer
Caution: Driver may be running on vibes, prayer, and expired energy drinks
Caution: Driver may be stress-eating at stoplights
Caution: Driver may cry at any wholesome content
Caution: Driver may cry at anything wholesome and nothing genuinely sad
Caution: Driver may cry at commercials but not actual sad things
Caution: Driver may cry at dog videos and nothing actually important
Caution: Driver may cry at dog videos but nothing else
Caution: Driver may cry at wholesome things but nothing genuinely emotional
Caution: Driver may cry-laugh-scream in any order
Caution: Driver may forget destination and purpose mid-trip
Caution: Driver may forget destination and still arrive somehow
Caution: Driver may forget destination mid-drive
Caution: Driver may forget destination while still driving there
Caution: Driver may forget destination, purpose, and identity
Caution: Driver may forget entire purpose of life mid-commute
Caution: Driver may forget entire purpose of trip
Caution: Driver may forget entire reason for existing mid-drive
Caution: Driver may forget why they left but still be driving
Caution: Driver may forget why they left the house
Caution: Driver may forget why they're angry mid-rant
Caution: Driver may forget why they're angry while remaining angry
Caution: Driver may forget why they're driving mid-drive
Caution: Driver may forget why they're upset mid-rant
Caution: Driver may forget why they're upset while still being upset
Caution: Driver may have forgotten destination
Caution: Driver may need an adult
Caution: Driver may need an adultier adult
Caution: Driver may need an adultier adult and also a map
Caution: Driver may need an adultier adult immediately
Caution: Driver may need an emotional support human
Caution: Driver may need emotional support and directions
Caution: Driver may stop for dogs, food, or no reason
Caution: Driver powered by pettiness
Caution: Driver running on anxiety and adrenaline
Caution: Driver running on fumes and delusion
Caution: Driver running on fumes, delusion, and iced coffee
Caution: Driver singing very badly
Caution: Driver talks to self
Caution: Easily distracted by food
Caution: Existential
Caution: Expert at wrong turns
Caution: Hot Mess
Caution: Hot Mess 2
Caution: Hot Tea
Caution: I have no idea what I'm doing
Caution: I’m late too
Caution: May brake for no apparent reason
Caution: May contain sarcasm and snacks
Caution: May contain traces of sanity
Caution: May Panic
Caution: May spontaneously dance at red lights
Caution: May stop for every dog
Caution: May ugly cry to sad songs
Caution: Mood Swings
Caution: Overthinking
Caution: Overthinking Mode
Caution: Parallel parking not included in skill set
Caution: Passenger seat full of emotional baggage
Caution: Professional overthinker
Caution: Sarcasm Ahead
Caution: Sass Ahead
Caution: Sass Loaded
Caution: Serial napper on board
Chaos AF
Chaos Alert
Chaos Coordinator Again
Chaos Coordinator Alert
Chaos Coordinator Extra
Chaos Coordinator Here
Chaos Coordinator Hero
Chaos Coordinator Mode
Chaos Coordinator Pending
Chaos Daily
Chaos Dealer
Chaos Enthusiast
Chaos Enthusiast 2
Chaos Incoming
Chaos Incoming Again
Chaos Incoming Alert
Chaos Incoming Hero
Chaos Incoming Mode
Chaos Incoming Soon
Chaos Is Life
Chaos Life
Chaos Manager Active
Chaos Overload
Chaos Specialist
Chaos Specialist 2
Chaos Specialist Active
Chaos Specialist Pending
Chaos Specialist: Hero
Chaos Vibes
Chaotic Brain Malfunctioning
Chaotic Caution
Chaotic Caution Incoming Always
Chaotic Caution Probably
Chaotic Chaos Incoming Always
Chaotic Chaos Loading
Chaotic Chaos Suspended Now
Chaotic Drama
Chaotic Drama Glitching Today
Chaotic Drama Loading Eventually
Chaotic Drama Mostly
Chaotic Drama Spiraling
Chaotic Energy Offline Mostly
Chaotic Existential Crisis Crashing Always
Chaotic Existential Crisis Malfunctioning Always
Chaotic Inner Child Offline
Chaotic Inner Child Today
Chaotic Mind Brewing Mostly
Chaotic Mind Lagging
Chaotic Mind Pending
Chaotic Mood Buffering
Chaotic Nap Now
Chaotic Nap Overdrafted Today
Chaotic Overthinking Brewing
Chaotic Overthinking Glitching Soon
Chaotic Overthinking Malfunctioning Probably
Chaotic Overthinking Spiraling Now
Chaotic Sarcasm Spiraling
Chaotic Sleep
Chaotic Sleep Malfunctioning Probably
Chaotic Vibe
Chaotic Vibe Eventually
Chaotic Vibe Pending Probably
Chaotic Vibe Suspended
Check Back Soon
CHILL
Chill Confusion
Chill Struggle
Chronic Eye Roll
Chronically Tired
Close Enough
Close Enough Brain
Close Enough Brainpower
Close Enough Engineering
Close Enough Intelligence
Close Enough Math
Close Enough Philosophy
Close Enough Science
Close Enough Thinking
Close Enough Wisdom
Coexist? I can barely exist
Coffee Alert
Coffee Needed
Coffee Needed AF
Coffee Needed Daily
Coffee Needed Forever
Coffee Needed Life
Coffee Needed Vibes
Concept Approved
Concept Car
Concept Pending
Conceptual Phase
Conceptual Win
Conclusion Pending
Conclusion TBD
Confidence Exceeded Logic
Confidence Gone
Confidence Loading
Confidence Not Included
Confidence Optional
Confidence Pending
Confidence Without Clarity
Confidence Without Evidence
Confident Guesswork
Confidently Unsure
CONFUSED
Confusion Achieved
Cool Story
Could Be Anything
Could Be Right
Could Be Smarter
Could Be Worse
Courtesy: Not included
Courtesy: Optional
CURIOUS
Currently Meh
Currently Rebooting
Currently Unbothered
Currently unsupervised
Data Missing
Dead Inside But Polite
Dead Inside Moving
Dead Inside Smiling
Dead Inside, Moving
Deadpan Energy
Define Correct
Define Done
Define Later
Define Normal
Define Success
Define Try
Delulu But Happy
Details Missing
Didn’t Work
Disagree
Disappointed But Not Surprised
Do Less
Do Not Disturb
Do Not Disturb AF
Do Not Disturb Club
Do Not Disturb Daily
Do Not Disturb Forever
Do Not Disturb Life
Do Not Disturb Mode
Do Not Disturb Vibes
Do Not Engage
Do Not Engage Alert
Do Not Engage Forever
Do Not Expect Much
Do Not Interrupt
Doing Enough
Doing It Anyway
Doing My Best
DOING OK
Doing Okay-ish
Don't follow me, I'm lost too
Don’t Ask
Don’t Care
Don’t Care AF
Don’t Care Club
Don’t Care Daily
Don’t Care Life
Don’t Care Vibes
Don’t Follow
Don’t follow me, I’m lost too
Don’t follow my mistakes
Don’t follow, I might disappear
Don’t honk, it offends me
Don’t honk, meditate
Don’t make me use my turn signal
Don’t Rush Me
Don’t tailgate my thoughts
Don’t tailgate, I bite
Don’t tailgate, meditate
Don’t Touch
Done Is Better
Done Pretending
Drama Alert
Drama Alert Active
Drama Alert: Active
Drama Alert: Hero
Drama Alert: Soft
Drama Avoided
Drama Avoider
Drama Free-ish
Drama Low
Drama Manager
Drama Manager Active
Drama Not Included
Drama On Hold
Drama Optional
Drama-Free
Drama-Free Hero
Drama-Free Today
Drama-Free Zone
Drama: Optional
DRIVE SAFE
Driver carries no cash, only dad jokes
Driver may spontaneously combust
DRIVING
Driving fast keeps me sane
EASY DOES IT
Educated Guess
Effort Applied
Emotion Buffer
Emotion Calm
Emotion Dim
Emotion Fog
Emotion Lite
Emotion Pending
Emotion Soft
Emotionally Bankrupt
Emotionally Bankrupt 2
Emotionally Booked
Emotionally Brain Malfunctioning
Emotionally Busy
Emotionally Chaos Lagging
Emotionally Complicated
Emotionally Dead Inside
Emotionally Drained
Emotionally Drama Malfunctioning
Emotionally Energy Crashing Eventually
Emotionally Energy Offline
Emotionally Expensive
Emotionally Expensive 2
Emotionally Expired
Emotionally Function
Emotionally Function Malfunctioning
Emotionally Function Overdrafted
Emotionally Inconvenienced
Emotionally Inner Child Offline
Emotionally Inner Child Overdrafted Forever
Emotionally Mood
Emotionally Mood Again
Emotionally Mood Spiraling Forever
Emotionally Nap Brewing Mostly
Emotionally Offline
Emotionally Offline 2
Emotionally Offline Again
Emotionally Overdrafted
Emotionally Overthinking Soon
Emotionally Overthinking Suspended
Emotionally Pending
Emotionally Pending…
Emotionally Questionable
Emotionally Questionable 2
Emotionally Sarcasm Always
Emotionally Sarcasm Spiraling Forever
Emotionally Sleep Crashing
Emotionally Sleep Incoming
Emotionally Sleep Lagging
Emotionally Slow
Emotionally Soft Chaos
Emotionally Soft Chaos Incoming Now
Emotionally Soft Chaos Suspended Seriously
Emotionally Spent
Emotionally Stable-ish
Emotionally Taxed
Emotionally Unavailable
Emotionally Unstable
Emotionally Unstable-ish
Emotionally Vibe Overdrafted Probably
Emotionally Vibe Pending Sometimes
Energy Drift
Energy Fade
Energy Leak
Energy Low
Energy Soft
Energy Undefined
Energy Unknown
ENOUGH
Error 404: Motivation not found
Estimated Outcome
Estimation Error
Everything hurts and I'm dying
Everything Is Dumb
Everything Is Too Much
Except Leaving
Excessive Sass
Existence Optional
Existential Buffering
Existential But Chill
Existential Crisis
Existential Crisis Club
Existential Crisis Club 2
Existential Crisis Incoming
Existential Crisis Mode
Existential Lite
Existential Mood
Existential Threat
Existential Threat Active
Existentially Confused
Existentially Confused Again
Existentially Confused Hero
Existentially Confused Mode
Existentially Dead
Existentially Dead Again
Existentially Meh
Existentially Meh Today
Existentially Over It
Existentially Tired
Existentially Weird
EXISTING
Existing Loudly
Expect Confusion
Expect Delays
Experience Questionable
Extra
Facts Pending
Fake It Daily
Fake Smile
Feed Me
Feed Me Forever
First Attempt
Fluent in Sarcasm
FOCUSED
Follow me if you dare
From Everything
Fueled by bad decisions and good intentions
Fueled by spite and iced coffee
Function Over Feelings
Functioning Barely
Functioning Maybe
Functioning Questionably
Functioning-ish
Future Me’s Problem
Future Problem
Gas, grass, or Bitcoin - nobody rides for free
Genius at work (sometimes)
Gentle Chaos
Gentle Living
Gentle Pace
Gentle Try
Go Away
GO SLOW
Good Enough For Now
GOOD LUCK
Grumpy AF
Grumpy Alert
Grumpy But Cute
Grumpy Forever
Grumpy Mood
Grumpy Mood AF
Grumpy Mood Daily
Grumpy Mood Life
Grumpy Mood Vibes
Guess Approved
Guess Mode
Guessing Boldly
Guessing Correctly
Guessing Professionally
Guessing Responsibly
Half Awake Full Sarcasm
Half Awake, Full Sarcasm
Half Baked
Halfway Confident
Halfway There
Hard Pass
Hard Reset
Hardly Awake
Hardly Thriving
HAVE PATIENCE
HERE
Here Against My Will
Here Goes Nothing
Highly Caffeinated
HONEST
Honk if a kid falls out
Honk if you love traffic
Honk if you're paying my car insurance
honk supportively, aggressively, or accidentally (unknown)
Hope Is Fading
Hot Caution Buffering
Hot Caution Seriously
Hot Drama Crashing
Hot Drama Overdrafted Today
Hot Energy
Hot Existential Crisis Glitching Mostly
Hot Existential Crisis Offline
Hot Function Overdrafted
Hot Garbage
Hot Head
Hot Head AF
Hot Head Alert
Hot Head Club
Hot Head Daily
Hot Head Forever
Hot Head Life
Hot Head Vibes
Hot Inner Child
Hot Inner Child Expired Now
Hot Mess
Hot Mess AF
Hot Mess Alert
Hot Mess Club
Hot Mess Daily
Hot Mess Express
Hot Mess Forever
Hot Mess Life
Hot Mess Vibes
Hot Mind Crashing Today
Hot Mind Loading
Hot Mood
Hot Nap Loading
Hot Nap Overdrafted
Hot Overthinking Buffering Now
Hot Overthinking Buffering Soon
Hot Sarcasm Incoming
Hot Sleep Brewing
Hot Sleep Expired Soon
Hot Sleep Soon
Hot Soft Chaos
Hot Soft Chaos Overdrafted
Hot Soft Chaos Probably
Hot Take
Hot Temper
Hot Trash
Hot Trash AF
Hot Trash Daily
Hot Trash Forever
Hot Trash Life
Hot Trash Vibes
Hot Vibe
HUMAN
Hyper Brain Expired Always
Hyper Brain Pending
Hyper Caution
Hyper Caution Again
Hyper Caution Lagging Definitely
Hyper Chaos
Hyper Chaos Eventually
Hyper Drama
Hyper Drama Overdrafted
Hyper Drama Sometimes
Hyper Energy Loading Soon
Hyper Energy Now
Hyper Existential Crisis Expired
Hyper Function Brewing
Hyper Function Crashing
Hyper Function Offline Forever
Hyper Inner Child
Hyper Inner Child Brewing Soon
Hyper Inner Child Forever
Hyper Inner Child Offline Sometimes
Hyper Inner Child Soon
Hyper Mind Incoming
Hyper Mind Lagging
Hyper Mood Buffering
Hyper Mood Crashing Mostly
Hyper Mood Glitching
Hyper Nap Eventually
Hyper Nap Lagging Always
Hyper Nap Malfunctioning
Hyper Overthinking Spiraling
Hyper Sarcasm
Hyper Sarcasm Buffering
Hyper Sarcasm Malfunctioning
Hyper Sarcasm Spiraling
Hyper Sleep
Hyper Sleep Brewing Today
Hyper Sleep Buffering
Hyper Sleep Loading
Hyper Soft Chaos Lagging Probably
Hyper Vibe
Hyper Vibe Overdrafted Mostly
I Asked Reddit
I Asked Someone
I brake for conspiracy theories
I brake for imaginary friends
I brake for no reason
I brake for sarcasm
I brake for... absolutely nothing
I can't adult today, please don't make me
I Can’t
I Can’t Be Fixed
I Can’t Have Nice Things
I Can’t Today
I Considered It
I Considered Options
I Didn’t Ask For
I Do Not Consent
I Don’t
I Don’t Enjoy This
I don’t have an attitude problem. You have a perception problem.
I Don’t Like Anyone
I drive like I own the road
I drive like I text
I drive like I’m invisible
I drive like your ex
I Expected Better
I Forgot Why
I Googled It
I Hate Being Perceived
I Hate Everything Equally
I Hate It Here
I Hate Small Talk
I Hate This Timeline
I Have No Idea What I’m Doing
I Have Notes
I Have Questions
I Have Zero Chill
I judge your driving silently
I Knew It
I Know This Is Dumb
I live in the fast lane, mentally
I love it when you cut me off
I make bad decisions, fast
I may be old, but I’m furious
I may swerve for snacks
I Meant to Do That
I Meant Well
I might be slow, but I’m consistent
I Miss Being Ignorant
I Miss Being Offline
I Miss Sleep
I Need A Break
I need a hug... or a large coffee... or a small vacation
I need a six-month vacation twice a year
I put the "elation" in "inflation"
I put the "fun" in dysfunctional
I Read Half
I Regret Everything
I Saw a Video
I Should’ve Stayed Home
I signal… eventually
I speak fluent sarcasm
I speed only on the inside
I survived another meeting that should've been an email
I take life in my lane
I Thought About It
I Thought So
I Thought This Through Poorly
I Tried Being Nice
I Tried Caring
I Tried Logic
I Tried Logic Once
I Tried My Best
I Tried Once
I Tried Optimism
I Tried Reasoning
I Tried Thinking
I Tried To Care
I void warranties
I Was Told
I Wing Everything
I'd rather be napping
I'm a vegan (just kidding, I eat bacon)
I'm not a control freak, but you're doing it wrong
I'm not aggressive, I'm assertively anxious
I'm not aggressive, I'm intensely present
I'm not aging gracefully, I'm aging hilariously
I'm not aging, I'm marinating
I'm not always late, time is early
I'm not always right, but I'm never wrong
I'm not always sarcastic, sometimes I'm sleeping
I'm not always tired, sometimes I'm exhausted
I'm not antisocial, humans are overrated as a species
I'm not antisocial, I'm anti-people sometimes
I'm not antisocial, I'm efficiently preserving social energy
I'm not antisocial, I'm efficiently social
I'm not antisocial, I'm pro-isolation
I'm not antisocial, I'm pro-me anti-everything-else
I'm not antisocial, I'm pro-me-time
I'm not antisocial, I'm pro-solitude
I'm not antisocial, I'm selectively social
I'm not antisocial, I'm selectively social and currently unselecting
I'm not antisocial, people are anti-compatible with me
I'm not antisocial, people are anti-me
I'm not antisocial, people are too social for me
I'm not antisocial, social is anti-me
I'm not arguing, I'm explaining why I'm right
I'm not avoidant, I'm selectively engaged
I'm not avoidant, I'm selectively present when convenient
I'm not avoidant, I'm strategically absent
I'm not avoidant, I'm strategically elsewhere
I'm not avoiding adulting, adulting is avoiding me
I'm not avoiding commitment, commitment is avoiding me
I'm not avoiding conflict, conflict is avoiding me
I'm not avoiding responsibilities, I'm delegating to future me
I'm not avoiding responsibility, it's avoiding me
I'm not avoiding responsibility, it's avoiding me harder
I'm not avoiding responsibility, it's mutual avoidance
I'm not avoiding responsibility, it's mutual avoidance at this point
I'm not avoiding responsibility, it's social distancing from me
I'm not avoiding responsibility, we're mutually avoiding each other
I'm not avoiding responsibility, we're on a break indefinitely
I'm not avoiding responsibility, we're on speaking terms barely
I'm not avoiding responsibility, we're taking a break
I'm not avoiding you specifically, I'm avoiding everyone
I'm not avoiding you specifically, I'm avoiding existence generally
I'm not avoiding you specifically, I'm avoiding existence generally today
I'm not avoiding you, I'm aggressively prioritizing myself
I'm not avoiding you, I'm practicing aggressive self-preservation
I'm not avoiding you, I'm practicing extreme self-care
I'm not avoiding you, I'm practicing self-care
I'm not avoiding you, I'm prioritizing my sanity aggressively
I'm not awkward, you're not interesting
I'm not being difficult, difficult is being me
I'm not being difficult, difficult is my comfort zone
I'm not being difficult, difficult is my factory setting
I'm not being difficult, easy mode is broken
I'm not being difficult, existing is difficult
I'm not being difficult, existing is inherently difficult
I'm not being difficult, I'm consistently me
I'm not being difficult, it comes naturally
I'm not being difficult, you're being impossibly reasonable
I'm not being difficult, you're being unreasonably easy
I'm not being difficult, you're making existence complicated
I'm not being difficult, you're making it complicated
I'm not being dramatic, reality is just extra
I'm not being extra, normal is being insufficient
I'm not being extra, normal is criminally boring
I'm not being extra, normal people are being criminally boring
I'm not being extra, this is my normal (concerning)
I'm not being extra, this is regular me
I'm not being extra, you're being aggressively minimal
I'm not being extra, you're being aggressively normal
I'm not being extra, you're being criminally normal
I'm not being extra, you're being dangerously insufficient
I'm not being extra, you're being insufficient
I'm not being extra, you're being minimal
I'm not bitter, I'm aged like fine wine (vinegar)
I'm not bitter, I'm aged to perfection
I'm not bossy, I just have better ideas
I'm not bossy, I'm the boss of me
I'm not chaotic, I'm whimsically disorganized
I'm not chronically online, I'm professionally scrolling
I'm not clumsy, gravity is obsessed with me
I'm not clumsy, the floor just hates me
I'm not cold, I'm emotionally climate-controlled
I'm not cold, I'm emotionally efficient
I'm not cold, I'm emotionally temperature-controlled
I'm not cold, I'm maintaining emotional boundaries aggressively
I'm not cold, I'm room temperature emotionally
I'm not cold, I'm thermally challenged emotionally and physically
I'm not cold-hearted, I'm conserving emotional energy
I'm not cold-hearted, I'm emotionally energy-efficient
I'm not cold-hearted, I'm emotionally energy-efficient always
I'm not cold-hearted, I'm emotionally resource-conservative
I'm not cold-hearted, I'm preserving emotional resources
I'm not cold-hearted, I'm room temperature-hearted
I'm not cold-hearted, I'm thermally challenged emotionally
I'm not commitment-phobic, I'm commitment-realistic
I'm not complicated, everyone else is aggressively simple
I'm not complicated, everyone else is oversimplified
I'm not complicated, everyone else is suspiciously simple
I'm not complicated, everyone else is suspiciously uncomplicated
I'm not complicated, simple broke up with me
I'm not complicated, simple doesn't understand me
I'm not complicated, simple doesn't work for me
I'm not complicated, simple is too complicated for me
I'm not complicated, you're dangerously oversimplifying
I'm not complicated, you're dangerously oversimplifying reality
I'm not complicated, you're oversimplifying
I'm not complicated, you're oversimplifying everything always
I'm not complicated, you're oversimplifying my chaos
I'm not complicated, you're oversimplifying my reasonable chaos
I'm not complicated, you're oversimplifying my simple chaos
I'm not complicated, you're oversimplifying reality
I'm not complicated, you're simple
I'm not confrontational, you're just wrong loudly
I'm not defensive, you're attacking me
I'm not defensive, you're offensive to my existence
I'm not difficult, I'm specifically particular
I'm not disorganized, I have an abstract filing system
I'm not disorganized, I'm creatively chaotic
I'm not disrespectful, I'm selectively respectful
I'm not dramatic, drama finds me specifically
I'm not dramatic, drama is magnetically attracted to me
I'm not dramatic, I'm authentically expressive without filters
I'm not dramatic, I'm authentically theatrical
I'm not dramatic, I'm cinematic
I'm not dramatic, I'm cinematically living
I'm not dramatic, I'm emotionally authentic with volume
I'm not dramatic, I'm emotionally expressive with flair
I'm not dramatic, I'm emotionally expressive with no filter
I'm not dramatic, I'm living cinematically without the budget
I'm not dramatic, I'm living with main character delusion
I'm not dramatic, I'm living with theatrical accuracy
I'm not dramatic, I'm living with theatrical flair
I'm not dramatic, I'm narratively enhanced
I'm not dramatic, life is just constantly dramatic at me
I'm not dramatic, reality is dramatic specifically at me
I'm not dramatic, the universe is gaslighting me
I'm not dramatic, the universe is specifically gaslighting me daily
I'm not dramatic, the universe is specifically testing me
I'm not dramatic, the universe is testing me specifically
I'm not dramatic, the world is dramatic at me constantly
I'm not emotionally unavailable, I'm emotionally on vacation
I'm not giving up, I'm strategically withdrawing
I'm not grumpy, cheerfulness is exhausting as a concept
I'm not grumpy, cheerfulness is overrated and exhausting
I'm not grumpy, happiness is suspiciously exhausting
I'm not grumpy, I'm authentically unenthusiastic
I'm not grumpy, this is my face
I'm not grumpy, this is my personality before coffee
I'm not grumpy, you're aggressively expecting positivity
I'm not grumpy, you're exhaustingly optimistic
I'm not grumpy, you're just aggressively cheerful
I'm not grumpy, you're just annoyingly optimistic
I'm not grumpy, you're offensively cheerful
I'm not grumpy, you're offensively chipper
I'm not high maintenance, maintenance is necessary
I'm not high maintenance, you're low effort
I'm not high maintenance, you're low effort at life
I'm not high-strung, I'm carefully tensioned
I'm not high-strung, I'm optimally tensioned for chaos
I'm not hoarding, I'm collecting memories (and junk)
I'm not ignoring red flags, I'm colorblind to warnings
I'm not ignoring you, I'm prioritizing my sanity
I'm not impatient, you're just slow
I'm not indecisive... I think
I'm not indifferent, I'm efficiently apathetic
I'm not insensitive, I'm efficiently empathetic
I'm not irresponsible, I'm creatively spontaneous
I'm not irresponsible, I'm spontaneously prioritizing
I'm not judging you, I'm studying you
I'm not judgmental, I'm observationally honest
I'm not lazy, I'm in power-saving mode permanently
I'm not lazy, I'm on energy-saving mode
I'm not lost, I'm exploring inefficiently
I'm not lost, I'm on a scenic route to nowhere
I'm not mean, I'm brutally honest
I'm not melodramatic, life is just theatrical
I'm not messy, I'm abstract
I'm not messy, I'm creatively organized
I'm not moody, I have atmospheric personality
I'm not moody, I have dynamic emotional weather
I'm not multitasking, I'm doing everything wrong simultaneously
I'm not negative, I'm a realist with flair
I'm not overdramatic, the world is under-reactive
I'm not overreacting, you're under-reacting
I'm not paranoid, everyone really is judging me
I'm not passive aggressive, bless your heart
I'm not passive, I'm energy-efficient
I'm not passive-aggressive, I'm aggressively passive
I'm not pessimistic, hope and I are legally separated
I'm not pessimistic, hope and I are no longer on speaking terms
I'm not pessimistic, hope and I had a falling out
I'm not pessimistic, I'm a disappointed former optimist
I'm not pessimistic, I'm a disappointed optimist
I'm not pessimistic, I'm a reformed optimist
I'm not pessimistic, I'm an experienced realist
I'm not pessimistic, I'm an optimist in recovery
I'm not pessimistic, I'm an optimist on permanent sabbatical
I'm not pessimistic, I'm an optimist with battle scars
I'm not pessimistic, I'm an optimist with experience
I'm not pessimistic, I'm optimistically realistic
I'm not pessimistic, I'm protecting my heart from hope
I'm not pessimistic, I'm protecting myself from false hope
I'm not pessimistic, I'm protecting myself from hope
I'm not pessimistic, I'm realistically disappointed
I'm not pessimistic, I'm realistically expecting disappointment
I'm not pessimistic, I'm realistically expecting the worst accurately
I'm not pessimistic, I'm realistically prepared for disappointment
I'm not pessimistic, optimism and I are on a break
I'm not pessimistic, optimism ghosted me
I'm not petty, I'm detail-oriented
I'm not problematic, I'm character-building
I'm not procrastinating, I'm doing side quests
I'm not rebellious, I'm creatively non-compliant
I'm not reckless, I'm adventurously incompetent
I'm not salty, I'm sodium-enriched
I'm not scatterbrained, I'm everywhere all at once
I'm not scattered, I'm dynamically focused
I'm not sensitive, you're insensitive to my sensitivity
I'm not sensitive, you're just insensitive
I'm not short, I'm fun-sized
I'm not short, you're just unnecessarily tall
I'm not short-tempered, you're just annoying
I'm not speeding, I'm fleeing my responsibilities
I'm not speeding, I'm qualifying
I'm not speeding, I'm time traveling
I'm not stubborn, I'm persistently correct
I'm not tailgating, I'm drafting
I'm not uncommunicative, I'm practicing silence
I'm not uncooperative, I'm independently minded
I'm not unfriendly, friendly is exhausting
I'm not unfriendly, I'm conserving social energy
I'm not unfriendly, I'm energy-conserving
I'm not unfriendly, I'm selectively friendly
I'm not unhinged, I'm liberally interpreted
I'm not unmotivated, I'm actively resisting
I'm not unmotivated, I'm motivationally challenged
I'm not unprofessional, I'm authentically chaotic
I'm not unreasonable, my demands are perfectly clear
I'm not unreasonable, my expectations are perfectly rational to me
I'm not unreasonable, reality is unreasonably unreasonable
I'm not unreasonable, reason and I had creative differences
I'm not unreasonable, reason has failed me
I'm not unreasonable, reason is overrated and exhausting
I'm not unreasonable, reason is overrated anyway
I'm not unreasonable, reason is unreasonable
I'm not unreasonable, reasonable has left the building
I'm not unreasonable, you're being aggressively sensible
I'm not unreasonable, you're being unreasonably reasonable again
I'm not unreasonable, you're being unreasonably reasonable constantly
I'm not unreasonable, you're unreasonably calm
I'm not unreasonable, you're unreasonably expecting reason
I'm not unreasonable, you're unreasonably reasonable
I'm not unreliable, I'm flexibly committed
I'm not unreliable, I'm flexibly present
I'm not unreliable, I'm spontaneously available
I'm not unreliable, I'm spontaneously flexible with commitments
I'm not unreliable, time is a construct I reject
I'm not unreliable, time is unreliable
I'm not unreliable, timing is a social construct
I'm not weird, I'm limited edition
I'm not weird, you're basic
I'm on energy-saving mode
I'm silently correcting your grammar
I'm typing so hard I might break the computer... wait, wrong sticker
I'm using my horn because I'm emotionally mature
I’d agree with you, but then we’d both be wrong
I’d let you pass, but why?
I’ll Adjust Later
I’ll Allow It
I’ll Allow This
I’ll Check
I’ll Circle Back
I’ll Circle Back Later
I’ll Decide Eventually
I’ll Decide Later
I’ll Decide When Ready
I’ll Figure It Eventually
I’ll Figure It Out
I’ll Fix It Later
I’ll Fix It Soon
I’ll Get Back
I’ll Know Soon
I’ll Learn Eventually
I’ll Learn Tomorrow
I’ll Look It Up
I’ll Reassess
I’ll Research Eventually
I’ll Revisit
I’ll Try Again
I’ll Update You
I’m Barely Participating
I’m Correct
I’m Disassociating
I’m Done Explaining
I’m Done Pretending
I’m Emotionally Fried
I’m Emotionally Spent
I’m Exhausted Internally
I’m Here
I’m Here Physically
I’m Holding Back
I’m Indifferent Aggressively
I’m Irritated By Default
I’m Irritated Calmly
I’m Judging Quietly
I’m Just Existing
I’m Just Here
I’m Just Here For The Exit
I’m Just Obliged
I’m Just Observing
I’m Just Tolerating This
I’m Mentally Clocked Out
I’m Mentally Exhausted
I’m Mentally Gone
I’m Mentally On Strike
I’m Mentally Over It
I’m Not A Morning Person
I’m not a tailgater, you’re too slow
I’m not antisocial. I’m selectively social.
I’m Not Arguing
I’m not avoiding you. I’m avoiding everyone.
I’m Not Built For This
I’m Not Buying It
I’m Not Convinced
I’m Not Engaged
I’m Not Engaging
I’m Not Enthusiastic
I’m not ignoring you. I’m giving you space to be wrong.
I’m Not Impressed
I’m Not Impressed Either
I’m Not Inspired
I’m Not Interested
I’m Not Laughing
I’m Not Listening
I’m not moody. I’m emotionally gifted.
I’m Not Motivated
I’m Not Okay
I’m not rude. I’m just honest faster than most people.
I’m not shy. I’m just quietly awesome.
I’m not speeding, I’m qualifying
I’m not stubborn. My way is just better.
I’m Not The Audience
I’m Not The Problem
I’m Not Thriving
I’m On Edge
I’m only aggressive in the car
I’m Out Of Bandwidth
I’m Out Of Energy
I’m Out Of Patience
I’m Over It
I’m Overqualified To Be Tired
I’m Overstimulated
I’m Overstimulated And Underpaid
I’m Overthinking
I’m Running On Fumes
I’m Running On Irritation
I’m Running Out Of Grace
I’m silently judging your playlist.
I’m So Done
I’m So Tired Of Everything
I’m Still Annoyed
I’m Still Bitter
I’m Still Mad
I’m Sure Enough
I’m the reason this lane exists
I’m Tired Already
I’m Tired Of Trying
I’m Too Aware
I’m Too Old For This
I’m Too Tired For This
I’m Uncomfortable
I’m Unimpressed Daily
I’m unpredictable, beware
I’ve Given Up
I’ve Had Enough
I’ve Lost All Enthusiasm
I’ve Lost Interest
I’ve Made My Peace
I’ve Reached My Limit
Idea Phase
Idea Still Loading
IDGAF
IDLE
If found, please return to bed
If you can read this, I’m not impressed
If you can read this, you're too close and I'm uncomfortable
Ignore Everything
Ignore Everything AF
Ignore Everything Daily
Ignore Everything Life
Ignore Everything Vibes
Ignore Me
In My Era
In Theory And Practice
Including Me
Including This
Incomplete Knowledge
Incomplete Thought
Inner Chaos
Inner Chaos Active
Inner Chaos Active 2
Inner Chaos Hero
Inner Chaos Manager
Inner Chaos Rising
Inner Child
Inner Child Active
Inner Child Alert
Inner Child Driving
Inner Child Driving Again
Inner Child Rising
Inner Child Rising Again
Inner Child Rules
Inner Child Unleashed
Inner Child: Active
Inner Child: Rising
Inner Lag
Inner Pause
Inner Peace Optional
Inner Peace Pending
Inner Peace-ish
Inner Static
Instructions Ignored
Internally Screaming
Introvert Loading
Introvert Mode
Introverts Unite Separately
Introverts Unite… Separately
Ironic
It Felt Right
It Looked Easy
It Made Sense
It Made Sense Then
It Might Pass
It Passed
It’s a Concept
It’s a Start
It’s Complicated
Just Breathing
Just Coping
JUST DRIVING
Just Enough
Just Existing
Just Floating
Just Obligated
Just Rolling
Just Surviving
Just Testing
Just Vibes
Just Vibing
Keep back, fragile ego inside
Keep calm and pass me
Keep distance, it’s personal space
KEEP GOING
Keep honking, I’m ignoring you
Keep honking, I’m practicing yoga
Keep honking, I’m reloading
Keep honking, it amuses me
Kinda Done
Lame
Late But Trying
Late Stage Tired
LATER
Lazy AF
Lazy Alert
Lazy Daily
Lazy Genius
Lazy Life
Lazy Vibes
Learning as I Go
Learning Curve Ahead
Learning Happens
Learning Live
Leave Me
Leave Me Alone
Let’s Find Out
Life Blur
Life Buffering
Life Easy
Life Is Meh
Life is short, drive like it
Life is short, make it awkward
Life Lag
Life Lite
Life Loading Slowly
Life Meh
Life Noise
Life On Mute
Life On Pause
Life Pending
Life Reset
Life Simple
Life Slow
Life Soft
Life Static
Life Under Construction
Lightly Researched
Limited Options
Limited Understanding
Living Somehow
Living that poor life with expensive taste
LOADING
Logic Deferred
Logic In Beta
Logic Later
Logic Lite
Logic Loading Slowly
Logic Not Found
Logic Optional
Logic Took a Break
Logic Was Optional
Looks About Right
Looks Convincing
Looks Correctish
Looks Fine From Here
Looks Official
Looks Right
Loosely Planned
LOUD
Low Bandwidth
Low Battery Energy
Low Battery Era
Low Battery Life
Low Brain
Low Brain Always
Low Caution Buffering
Low Caution Loading Always
Low Caution Overdrafted Eventually
Low Chaos
Low Chaos Malfunctioning
Low Chaos Rising
Low Drama Buffering Seriously
Low Drama Expired Today
Low Drama Probably
Low Drive
Low Effort
Low Effort Club
Low Effort Forever
Low Effort Hero
Low Effort Icon
Low Effort Mode
Low Effort Pending
Low Energy
Low Energy Alert
Low Energy Club
Low Energy Hero
Low Energy High Sarcasm
Low Energy Icon
Low Energy Incoming
Low Energy Overdrafted
Low Energy Pending
Low Energy Vibes
Low Energy Zone
Low Existential Crisis Brewing Definitely
Low Existential Crisis Loading Now
Low Existential Crisis Offline
Low Expectations
Low Expectations Club
Low Function
Low Function Malfunctioning Forever
Low Inner Child Brewing
Low Key AF
Low Key Alert
Low Key Chaotic
Low Key Daily
Low Key Life
Low Key Savage
Low Mind
Low Mind Probably
Low Momentum
Low Mood Crashing Eventually
Low Mood Crashing Probably
Low Mood Pending Mostly
Low Nap
Low Nap Brewing
Low Nap Eventually
Low Nap Spiraling
Low Nap Spiraling Today
Low Overthinking Always
Low Overthinking Malfunctioning Always
Low Overthinking Overdrafted Today
Low Patience Mode
Low Pressure
Low Sarcasm
Low Sarcasm Crashing Now
Low Sarcasm Crashing Sometimes
Low Sarcasm Loading Sometimes
Low Signal
Low Sleep Crashing Probably
Low Soft Chaos Pending Again
Low Stress
Low Vibe
Low Vibe Glitching Always
Low Vibe Overdrafted Definitely
Lower The Bar
Main Character
Main Character Alert
Main Character Energy
Main Character Energy 2
Main Character Mode
Main Character-ish
Mainly Confused
Major Sass
Majorly Over It
Math Was Involved
May Contain Errors
MAYBE
Maybe It Works
Maybe Tomorrow
Me, Myself, Nope
Meditation is key... I always forget where I put my keys
Meh
Meh AF
Meh Alert
Meh Daily
Meh Forever
Meh Life
Meh Mode
Meh Vibes
Mental Draft
Mental Draft Mode
Mental Drift
Mental Ease
Mental Fog
Mental Lag
Mental Loading
Mental Low
Mental Math Failed
Mental Pause
Mental Shortcut
Mental Static
Mentally AFK
Mentally Caution Brewing
Mentally Caution Pending
Mentally Chaos Brewing
Mentally Checked Out
Mentally Clueless
Mentally Drama
Mentally Drama Brewing Forever
Mentally Drama Rising
Mentally Drama Today
Mentally Elsewhere
Mentally Energy Always
Mentally Energy Brewing Forever
Mentally Energy Buffering Definitely
Mentally Energy Mostly
Mentally Energy Pending
Mentally Existential Crisis Brewing
Mentally Existential Crisis Eventually
Mentally Existential Crisis Glitching
Mentally Existential Crisis Rising Sometimes
Mentally Function
Mentally Function Incoming Sometimes
Mentally Function Loading Mostly
Mentally Function Pending
Mentally Inner Child
Mentally Inner Child Malfunctioning
Mentally Meh
Mentally Mind Lagging
Mentally Mind Pending Today
Mentally Mood
Mentally Mood Crashing
Mentally Mood Suspended Seriously
Mentally Nap Malfunctioning
Mentally Offline
Mentally Offline Again
Mentally On Break
Mentally On Strike
Mentally Overdrawn
Mentally Overloaded
Mentally Sarcasm Crashing
Mentally Sarcasm Eventually
Mentally Sarcasm Loading
Mentally Sarcasm Mostly
Mentally Sleep Loading Forever
Mentally Snackless
Mentally Soft Chaos Crashing Definitely
Mentally Soft Chaos Rising Soon
Mentally Unavailable
Mentally Unstable But Polite
Mentally Vibe Forever
Midlife Loading
Might Improve
Mildly Annoyed
Mildly Annoyed AF
Mildly Annoyed Daily
Mildly Annoyed Life
Mildly Annoyed Vibes
Mildly Done
Mildly Hostile
Mildly Qualified
Mind In Progress
Mind Lag
Mind Lag Active
Mind Lag Alert
Mind Lag: Active
Mind Lagging
Mind Malfunction
Mind Offline
Mind Offline Again
MINIMAL
Minimal Alert
Minimal Brain
Minimal Brainpower
Minimal Chaos
Minimal Drama
Minimal Effort
Minimal Effort AF
Minimal Effort Club
Minimal Effort Daily
Minimal Effort Life
Minimal Effort Max
Minimal Effort Vibes
Minimal Motivation
Minimal Vibes
Minimum Viable Effort
Mistakes Were Made
Mood
Mood AF
Mood Alert
Mood Blank
Mood Daily
Mood Drift
Mood Easy
Mood Error
Mood Forever
Mood Life
Mood Loading
Mood Loading Slowly
Mood Malfunction
Mood Malfunction Active
Mood Mild
Mood Neutral
Mood Soft
Mood Softly Crashing
Mood Swings
Mood Undefined
Mood: Error
Mood: Flatline
Mood: Loading…
Mood: Low Battery
Mood: Malfunction
Mood: Meh
Mood: Offline
Mood: Pending
Mood: Pending Update
Mood: Undefined
Mood: Undefined Again
Mood: Undefined Hero
Mood: Unknown
Motivation Missing
Move over, genius behind you
MOVING
My adulting skills are buffering
My alone time is for your safety
My anxiety has anxiety
My attention span is sponsored by goldfish
My autopilot has taken over permanently
My backup dancer is my anxiety
My backup personality has also given up
My backup personality is also concerning
My backup personality is also problematic
My backup personality is also under construction
My backup personality is in the shop indefinitely
My backup personality is in therapy indefinitely
My backup plan abandoned ship years ago
My backup plan has a backup plan (both terrible)
My backup plan has abandoned me
My backup plan has also filed for bankruptcy
My backup plan is chaos with a hint of prayer
My backup plan is crying in the parking lot
My backup plan is having no plan
My backup plan is hoping aliens rescue me
My backup plan is hoping for the best (not going well)
My backup plan is panic
My backup plan is panicking stylishly
My backup plan is panicking with style
My backup plan is screaming into the void stylishly
My backup plan is screaming stylishly
My backup plan is winging it with style
My bed is a magical place where I suddenly remember everything
My blood type is coffee positive
My brain autocorrects normal to chaos
My brain has too many tabs open
My brain has unread notifications from 2019
My brain is 80% song lyrics
My brain is a browser that crashed in 2019
My brain is a browser with 400 tabs and all are frozen
My brain is a browser with 47 tabs open
My brain is a Choose Your Own Adventure book (all bad endings)
My brain is a computer from 1995 trying to run modern software
My brain is a conspiracy board connecting nothing to everything
My brain is a conspiracy board with no connections
My brain is a conspiracy theory about itself
My brain is a conspiracy theory about my own existence
My brain is a filing cabinet on fire
My brain is a filing cabinet someone set on fire
My brain is a hamster on a broken wheel
My brain is a hamster wheel but the hamster is on strike
My brain is a hamster wheel but the hamster quit
My brain is a jukebox playing only anxious bangers
My brain is a jukebox playing only anxious thoughts
My brain is a jukebox playing only worst-case scenarios
My brain is a loading screen that abandoned hope
My brain is a loading screen that froze
My brain is a pinball machine (I'm losing)
My brain is a pinball machine (someone unplugged it)
My brain is a random word generator
My brain is a search engine returning only anxious results
My brain is a search engine with only sponsored results
My brain is a snow globe someone won't stop shaking
My brain is a Spotify playlist on shuffle (all sad songs)
My brain is autocorrect but for anxiety
My brain is buffering... still buffering
My brain is elevator music interrupted by screaming
My brain is running on fumes and poor programming
My brain is Windows 95 trying to run Cyberpunk 2077
My brain is Windows Vista trying to exist
My car is held together by duct tape and optimism
My car is paid off (in my dreams)
My car payment is more than my rent
My car runs on hopes and dreams (mostly hopes)
My carbon footprint is bigger than my social life
My chill is a carefully maintained illusion
My comfort food is all food and also more food
My comfort food is all the food
My comfort food is also my comfort, discomfort, and personality
My comfort food is my entire identity
My comfort food is my entire personality
My comfort food is my personality
My comfort zone has "do not disturb" signs
My comfort zone has "no trespassing" signs everywhere
My comfort zone has comfort zones
My comfort zone has filed for independence
My comfort zone has restraining orders against reality
My comfort zone is also my danger zone (couch)
My comfort zone is anywhere horizontal
My comfort zone is avoiding discomfort zones
My comfort zone is called "anywhere but here"
My comfort zone is called "bed"
My comfort zone is horizontal and unavailable
My comfort zone is permanently closed for renovations
My comfort zone is under construction permanently
My comfort zone is very comfortable
My coping mechanism is online shopping
My coping skills are a work in progress (not progressing)
My credit score is my favorite horror movie
My driving improves with coffee
My driving scares me too
My emotional availability is "404 error not found"
My emotional availability is "currently experiencing technical difficulties"
My emotional availability is "error 404 not found"
My emotional availability is "out of office indefinitely"
My emotional availability is "out of office permanently"
My emotional availability is "permanently out of order"
My emotional availability is currently unavailable
My emotional availability is experiencing permanent technical difficulties
My emotional availability is experiencing technical difficulties indefinitely
My emotional availability is permanently out of stock
My emotional availability is permanently unavailable
My emotional range is "fine" to "not fine"
My emotional range is "meh" to "help"
My emotional range is "meh" to "why is everything"
My emotional range is "numb" to "overwhelmed" with no middle
My emotional range is "numb" to "too much"
My emotional range is "pretending hard" to "pretending harder"
My emotional range is "pretending I'm fine" to "still pretending"
My emotional range is "pretending I'm okay" to "still pretending harder"
My emotional range is "pretending" to "still pretending harder"
My emotional range is tired to more tired
My emotional state is "barely holding it together fashionably"
My emotional state is "fine" (it has never been fine)
My emotional state is "fine" (narrator voice: everything was on fire)
My emotional state is "fine" (narrator: it was not fine)
My emotional state is "fine" (translation: absolutely not fine)
My emotional state is "fine" (translation: send help)
My emotional state is "screaming but make it silent"
My emotional state is "screaming internally externally"
My emotional state is "screaming internally"
My emotional state is buffering at 99%
My emotional state is buffering at 99% permanently
My emotional state is permanently buffering
My emotional support animal is carbs
My emotional support has filed a restraining order
My emotional support has left the chat
My emotional support is as reliable as this car (concerning)
My emotional support is out of stock indefinitely
My emotional support is overpriced and unavailable
My emotional support is overpriced coffee
My emotional support is this car payment
My emotional support is this car's warranty (expired)
My emotional support is this gas tank (also running on empty)
My emotional support needs emotional support
My energy levels are "nope"
My filter is broken and I'm not fixing it
My GPS gave up
My GPS has trust issues
My GPS hates me too
My GPS is as lost as I am
My happy place is also my sad place (bed)
My hobbies are expensive and I'm broke
My hobbies include eating and complaining about being tired
My hobby is collecting hobbies I'll never start
My imaginary friend thinks you have issues
My kid was inmate of the month
My life coach is a bottle of wine
My life coach quit
My life hack is lowering expectations
My life hack is pretending I have it together
My life is 10% living, 90% wondering what to eat
My life is a blooper reel
My life is a blooper reel that never makes the actual show
My life is a blooper reel without the actual show
My life is a blooper reel without the actual successful takes
My life is a choose your own adventure (all paths lead to chaos)
My life is a Choose Your Own Dysfunction
My life is a comedy special nobody asked to see
My life is a comedy written by someone who hates me
My life is a constant battle between wanting to be productive and wanting to nap
My life is a group project where everyone including me ghosted
My life is a group project where I'm the only member
My life is a participation award for barely participating
My life is a participation trophy
My life is a participation trophy covered in participation scratches
My life is a participation trophy for showing up barely
My life is a participation trophy for showing up barely sometimes
My life is a participation trophy I didn't want
My life is a participation trophy I want to return
My life is a participation trophy nobody asked for
My life is a rough draft
My life is a rough draft that's due tomorrow
My life is a rough draft that's permanently rough
My life is a series of "seemed like a good idea"
My life is a series of "what could go wrong" answers
My life is a series of awkward moments
My life is basically a romantic comedy minus the romance
My life is directed by someone who hates me
My life is held together by coffee and chaos
My life is held together by spite and iced coffee exclusively
My life is narrated by Morgan Freeman (in my head)
My life is sponsored by poor choices
My life is sponsored by questionable decisions
My life motto is "everything happens" (that's it, that's the motto)
My life motto is "fake it till you make it" (decade 3 of faking)
My life motto is "it be like that sometimes"
My life motto is "it could be worse" (it got worse)
My life motto is "it is what it is and it's terrible"
My life motto is "it is what it is" (it shouldn't be this)
My life motto is "well that happened"
My life motto is "well that's happening whether I consent or not"
My life motto is "well this is happening whether I like it or not"
My life motto is "why not make it worse"
My life philosophy is "everything happens for a reason" (the reason is bad)
My life philosophy is "everything is fine" (nothing is fine)
My life philosophy is "everything's fine" (narrator: nothing was fine)
My life philosophy is "everything's fine" (nothing has ever been fine)
My life philosophy is "fake confidence until confidence fakes you"
My life philosophy is "if it's not one thing it's your mother"
My life philosophy is "if you can't laugh, cry stylishly"
My life philosophy is "it be like that" (it really do be)
My life philosophy is "whatever happens, happens"
My life soundtrack is elevator music on repeat
My life soundtrack is Windows error sounds
My life strategy is "fake it till you make it" (still faking)
My life strategy is "panic now, plan later"
My life strategy is improvisation with occasional panic
My life strategy is improvisation without preparation
My life strategy is improvisation without skills or plans
My life strategy is winging it with aggressive confidence
My life strategy is winging it with confidence
My life strategy is winging it with excessive confidence
My love language is food and silence
My New Year's resolution is 1080p
My other car is a broomstick
My other car is also a piece of junk
My other car is yours
My other ride is imaginary
My other ride is your mom
My patience is on vacation
My patience ran away
My personality is "chaos coordinator without the coordination"
My personality is "chaos coordinator without the coordinator"
My personality is "chaos with a carefully maintained exterior"
My personality is "chaos with a schedule"
My personality is "chaos wrapped in more chaos"
My personality is "chaotic neutral with tired energy"
My personality is "disaster but make it aesthetic"
My personality is "permanently buffering"
My personality is "perpetually overwhelmed but make it aesthetic"
My personality is "perpetually overwhelmed"
My personality is "perpetually tired with chaotic energy bursts"
My personality is "perpetually tired with occasional bursts of chaos"
My personality is "tired but make it a lifestyle"
My personality is "tired but make it chronic"
My personality is "tired but make it funny"
My personality is "tired sarcasm with occasional joy"
My personality is "tired sarcasm"
My personality is 60% iced coffee
My personality is 90% coffee
My personality is seasonal (currently winter)
My personality type is "chaotic tired"
My personality type is "disaster with a to-do list"
My personality type is "disaster with good intentions somewhere"
My personality type is "disaster with organized chaos"
My personality type is "walking anxiety with occasional confidence"
My personality type is "walking crisis with occasional joy"
My personality type is "walking disaster with good intentions"
My personality type is "walking existential crisis"
My plants are dead but I'm thriving
My poker face is also my regular face
My retirement plan is a GoFundMe
My retirement plan is winning the lottery
My safe word is "help"
My self-care is ignoring my problems
My social battery died three exits ago
My spirit animal is a raccoon in a dumpster
My spirit animal is a sloth on vacation
My standards are low but somehow unmet
My stress relief is creating more stress
My therapist drives a nicer car than me
My therapist says I need an outlet
My tolerance for nonsense expired in 2020
My tolerance for people is at an all-time low
My tolerance level: zero point zero
My toxic trait is thinking I can fix everything with a nap
My vibe is "unhinged but make it cute"
My weekend is all booked (with naps)
My WiFi is faster than this car
Nap Dealer
Nap Dealer Active
Nap Dealer Extraordinaire
Nap Enthusiast
Nap First Adult Later
Nap First, Adult Later
Nap Mode
Nap Mode Activated
Nap Time CEO
Napping
Needs Context
Next
No Backup Plan
No Chill
No Expectations Met
No Fucks AF
No Fucks Daily
No Fucks Given
No Fucks Life
No Fucks Vibes
No Further Questions
NO HURRY
No Joy Detected
No Passion Detected
No Permission
No Plans
No Plans Club
No Revisions Yet
NO RUSH
No Thanks
No Thoughts Head Empty
No Thoughts Just Vibes
None Are Nice
Nope
Nor My Worst
Not a Pro
Not all who wander are lost, but I definitely am
Not all who wander are lost, some are just bad at directions
Not Built for This
Not Fully Awake
Not Fully Tested
Not Impressed
Not Included
Not Invited
Not lost, just exploring poorly
Not My Problem
Not responsible for bad decisions
Not Sorry Club
Not speeding, aggressively cruising
Not Sure Yet
NOT TODAY
Not Today AF
Not Today Alert
Not Today Brain
Not Today Club
Not Today Daily
Not Today Life
Not Today Vibes
Nothing Impresses Me
Nothing More
Nothing Sparks Joy
NOW
NPC Energy
Objects in mirror are dumber than they appear
OFFLINE
Offline Brain
Offline Preferred
OKAY
ON MY WAY
On Second Thought
ONE DAY
ONLINE
Oops
Oops All Chaos
Oops All Energy
Oops Brain Error
Oops Brain Glitch
Oops Mental Error
Oops, did I hit your ego?
Oops, Still Alive
Or Afternoon
Or Night
Outcome Unknown
Over It
Over It AF
Over It Alert
Over It Club
Over It Daily
Over It Forever
Over It Life
Over It Vibes
Overconfident Guess
Overly Brain Buffering
Overly Brain Malfunctioning Sometimes
Overly Brain Offline Eventually
Overly Caffeinated
Overly Caution Offline Again
Overly Chaos Incoming
Overly Chaos Malfunctioning Sometimes
Overly Chaos Sometimes
Overly Chaos Spiraling Always
Overly Drama
Overly Drama Rising
Overly Energy Pending
Overly Existential Crisis Lagging
Overly Existential Crisis Malfunctioning
Overly Existential Crisis Suspended
Overly Function
Overly Function Incoming
Overly Inner Child
Overly Inner Child Incoming Mostly
Overly Inner Child Spiraling
Overly Mind
Overly Mood Brewing Probably
Overly Nap
Overly Nap Malfunctioning Seriously
Overly Overthinking
Overly Sarcasm Buffering Eventually
Overly Sleep
Overly Soft Chaos Brewing
Overly Soft Chaos Pending
Overly Vibe Crashing
Overqualified
Overreactor
Overreactor Alert
Overreactor Forever
Overstimulated
Overtake at your own risk
Overthink Everything
Overthinker Central
Overthinking
Overthinking AF
Overthinking Again
Overthinking Alert
Overthinking Always
Overthinking Club
Overthinking Daily
Overthinking Everything
Overthinking Expert
Overthinking Hero
Overthinking Icon
Overthinking Incoming
Overthinking Life
Overthinking Mode
Overthinking Pro
Overthinking Professional
Overthinking Vibes
Overthought It
Partial Credit
Partial Understanding
Passive Aggressive
Patience is overrated
Patience: Not in stock
PAUSED
Peace Was Never An Option
Peak Confusion
Peak Delusion
Peak Meh
PENDING
Pending Explanation
Physically Present
Plan B Missing
Please Advise
Please Don’t
Please Lower Your Voice
Please Stand By
Please Stop
Please Stop Talking
Plot twist: I'm the villain
Politely
Poorly Estimated
Possibly Correct
Powered by anxiety and coffee
Powered by Guesswork
PRESENT
Probably Fine
Probably Late
Probably Legal
Probably Wrong
Problematic
Problematic AF
Problematic Daily
Problematic Life
Problematic Vibes
Proceed with Caution
Process Unclear
Processing Error
Procrastinate All Day
Procrastinate Everything
Procrastination Club
Procrastination Professional
Procrastinators unite... tomorrow
Professional cloud watcher on board
Professional Daydreamer
Professional Overthinker
Professional overthinker on board
Professional procrastinator since birth
Progress Not Perfection
Progress Pending
Question Everything
Questionable Logic
QUIET
Quiet Chaos
Quiet Chaos Again
Quiet Chaos Club
Quiet Effort
Quiet Grind
Quiet Mode
Quietly
Quietly Caution
Quietly Caution Overdrafted Now
Quietly Chaos
Quietly Chaos Seriously
Quietly Chaos Spiraling
Quietly Drama Buffering
Quietly Drama Malfunctioning Definitely
Quietly Drama Rising
Quietly Drama Sometimes
Quietly Drama Spiraling Now
Quietly Energy Buffering Now
Quietly Energy Pending
Quietly Function Always
Quietly Function Glitching
Quietly Function Malfunctioning
Quietly Function Offline
Quietly Inner Child Crashing Mostly
Quietly Inner Child Soon
Quietly Judging
Quietly Judging Again
Quietly Judging You
Quietly Losing It
Quietly Mind
Quietly Mind Brewing
Quietly Mind Crashing
Quietly Mind Definitely
Quietly Mind Incoming Always
Quietly Mood
Quietly Mood Forever
Quietly Nap
Quietly Nap Expired Today
Quietly Overthinking
Quietly Overthinking Definitely
Quietly Overthinking Malfunctioning Mostly
Quietly Overthinking Now
Quietly Panic
Quietly Sarcasm Today
Quietly Sarcastic
Quietly Screaming
Quietly Sleep
Quietly Sleep Again
Quietly Sleep Buffering Again
Quietly Soft Chaos Brewing Definitely
Quietly Soft Chaos Expired
Quietly Tired
Quietly Vibe Brewing
READY
REAL
Reality called, so I hung up
Reasonable Attempt
Reasonable Confusion
Reasoning Paused
REBOOT
RELAXED
RESET
Rest Is Productive
Rest Mode
RESTING
Resting Face
Results May Vary
Results Pending
Road ahead: disappointment
Road rage in training
Road rules optional
Road tested, sanity pending
Running on Autopilot
Running on fumes and poor decisions
Running on Hope
Running On Regret
Running on Spite
Runs on caffeine and chaos
SAFE TRAVELS
Sarcasm Activated
Sarcasm AF
Sarcasm Alert
Sarcasm Always
Sarcasm Certified
Sarcasm Certified 2
Sarcasm Certified Again
Sarcasm Daily
Sarcasm Expert
Sarcasm First
Sarcasm Forever
Sarcasm In Progress
Sarcasm is my love language.
Sarcasm Life
Sarcasm Loading
Sarcasm Loading Hero
Sarcasm Loading… Again
Sarcasm Loading… Wait
Sarcasm Mode On
Sarcasm Mode Pending
Sarcasm Mode: Active
Sarcasm On Fleek
Sarcasm On Standby
Sarcasm Queen
Sarcasm Vibes
Sarcasm: Certified
Sarcasm: just one of the services I offer
Sarcasm: Overload
Sarcastic AF
Sarcastic Brain
Sarcastic Brain Active
Sarcastic Vibes Only
Sarcastic Vibes Pending
Sass Activated
Sass Alert
Sass Forever
Sass Mode
Sass Mode AF
Sass Mode Daily
Sass Mode Life
Sass Mode Vibes
Seems Accurate Enough
Seems Important
Seems Legit
Seems Logical
Seems Reasonable
Seems Smart Enough
Serial Napper
Serial Napper AF
Serial Napper Daily
Serial Napper Life
Serial Napper Vibes
Shhh... nobody cares
Shrug
SIMPLE
Since Yesterday
Sleep Deprived But Cute
Sleep Deprived Genius
Sleep Deprived Hero
Sleep Deprived Icon
Sleep Mode Activated
Sleep Overload
Sleepy But Cute
Sleepy But Sassy
Sleepy Chaos
Sleepy Chaos Mode
Slightly Annoyed
Slightly Annoyed Forever
Slightly Brain
Slightly Brain Buffering Eventually
Slightly Brain Probably
Slightly Caution
Slightly Caution Incoming Eventually
Slightly Caution Loading Sometimes
Slightly Caution Overdrafted
Slightly Chaos Brewing
Slightly Chaos Brewing Forever
Slightly Chaos Glitching
Slightly Chaos Pending
Slightly Chaos Spiraling
Slightly Concerned
Slightly Dangerous Mood
Slightly Done
Slightly Drama
Slightly Drama Pending
Slightly Drama Soon
Slightly Energy
Slightly Energy Brewing Always
Slightly Energy Malfunctioning Definitely
Slightly Energy Overdrafted Eventually
Slightly Energy Pending Probably
Slightly Existential Crisis Mostly
Slightly Feraled
Slightly Fermented
Slightly Fermented Thoughts
Slightly Function Expired
Slightly Function Glitching Sometimes
Slightly Function Incoming Always
Slightly Function Pending
Slightly Function Pending Mostly
Slightly Inner Child
Slightly Inner Child Expired
Slightly Mind Incoming
Slightly Mood
Slightly Nap
Slightly Nap Offline Sometimes
Slightly Nap Pending
Slightly Over It
Slightly Sarcasm Crashing Sometimes
Slightly Sarcasm Expired Mostly
Slightly Sarcasm Pending
Slightly Soft Chaos Expired Sometimes
Slightly Soft Chaos Forever
SLOW
Slow car, fast attitude
SLOW DOWN
Slow down, genius ahead
Slow driver ahead, surprise!
Slow driver, big attitude
Slow Living
Slow Motion
Slow Progress
Social Battery Low
Socially Tired
SOFT
Soft Brain
Soft Brain Incoming Eventually
Soft But Dangerous
Soft But Savage
Soft But Unstable
Soft Caution
Soft Chaos
Soft Chaos Active
Soft Chaos Active 2
Soft Chaos Club
Soft Chaos Crashing Sometimes
Soft Chaos Energy
Soft Chaos Energy 2
Soft Chaos Hero
Soft Chaos Incoming
Soft Chaos Incoming Again
Soft Chaos Mode
Soft Chaos Only
Soft Chaos Pending
Soft Chaos: Active
Soft Chaos: Hero
Soft Chaos: Incoming
Soft Chaos: Pending Hero
Soft Days
Soft Effort
Soft Energy
Soft Existential Crisis
Soft Existential Crisis Always
Soft Existential Crisis Glitching Today
Soft Existential Crisis Soon
Soft Existential Crisis Spiraling Always
Soft Focus
Soft Function Spiraling Forever
Soft Inner Child Brewing Definitely
Soft Inner Child Buffering
Soft Inner Child Spiraling
Soft Launch
Soft Launch Life
Soft Mind
Soft Mind Overdrafted Now
Soft Mode
Soft Nap Seriously
Soft Overthinking Buffering Seriously
Soft Overthinking Offline Seriously
Soft Reset
Soft Reset Active
Soft Reset Active Hero
Soft Reset Club
Soft Reset Club 2
Soft Reset Complete
Soft Reset Energy
Soft Reset Energy 2
Soft Reset Incoming
Soft Reset Mode
Soft Reset Pending
Soft Reset Pending Hero
Soft Reset: Hero
Soft Sarcasm Malfunctioning Now
Soft Sarcasm Offline
Soft Soft Chaos
Soft Soft Chaos Pending
Soft Spiral
Soft Vibe Pending Eventually
Softly Broken
Softly Broken 2
Softly Chaotic
Softly Confused
Softly Existing
Softly Sarcastic
Softly Sarcastic 2
Softly Screaming
Softly Screaming Again
Softly Screaming Mode
Softly Spiraling
Softly Surviving
Softly Surviving Hero
Softly Surviving Today
Softly Tired
Softly Weird
Softly Weird Today
Some Assembly Required
Somewhat Accurate
Somewhat Functional
Sorry for driving so close in front of you
Sorry for driving so close… not
Sorry for existing on your road
Sorry for what I said before coffee
Sorry, I'm late. I didn't want to come
Sorry, I’m mentally elsewhere
Sort of Ready
Specifically
STAY BACK
Stay back, I’m unsure
STAY CALM
STEADY
STILL
Still Annoyed
Still Annoyed Somehow
Still Awake
Still Awake AF
Still Awake Alert
Still Awake Club
Still Awake Daily
Still Awake Life
Still Awake Vibes
Still Awake-ish
Still Awake: Barely
Still Breathing
Still Buffering
Still Calculating
Still Counting
Still Deciding
Still Decoding
Still Disappointed
Still Don’t
Still Evaluating
Still Existing
Still Figuring It Out
Still Going
Still Guessing
Still Here
Still Here Somehow
Still Here Though
Still Here, Barely
Still Here, Barely 2
Still Here-ish
Still Irritated
Still Learning
Still Loading
Still Mad About It
Still Not Convinced
Still Not Sure
Still Pretending
Still Pretending To Function
Still Pretending To Work
Still Processing
Still Processing Data
Still Processing Life
Still Standing
Still Standing Forever
Still Surviving
Still Surviving Somehow
Still Testing Reality
Still Thinking
Still Thinking About It
Still Thinking Honestly
STILL TIRED
Still Trying
Still Unclear
Still Unsure
Still Unsure Why
Still Waiting For Better
Still Waking
Still Waking Up
Still Wondering
STOPPED
Stressed Blessed Obsessed
Stressed But Dressed
Stressed But Stylish
Stressed, Blessed, Obsessed
Student driver (of you crazy)
Surely not everybody was kung fu fighting
Surviving Aesthetically
Tailgaters make me nervous
TAKE IT EASY
Talk Later
Temporary Brain
Temporary Genius
Temporary Logic
Temporary Solution
Testing Limits
Thanks For Asking
That Tracks
That’s a Choice
That’s Acceptable
That’s Close
That’s Close Enough
That’s Enough
That’s Fine Right
That’s Later
That’s Later Me
That’s My Guess
That’s On Me
That’s Probably Right
Theoretical Success
Theory In Progress
Theory Only
Theory vs Reality
Think About It
Think Later
THINKING
Thinking About It
Thinking In Progress
Thinking Lightly
Thinking Optional
Thinking Softly
Thinking Takes Time
This Ain’t It
This car climbed Mount Walmart
This car stops for sarcasm
This Could Be Worse
This Could’ve Been An Email
This Counts
This Counts Right
This Feels Like A Trap
This Is A Cry For Help
This Is A Hard No
This Is A Lot
This Is A Lot Of Nonsense
This Is A Mess
This Is A Mistake
This Is Annoying
This Is Annoying Me
This Is Chaos
This Is Exhausting
This Is Experimental
This Is Fine
This Is My Guess
This Is My Limit
This is my resting "don't talk to me" face
This Is Not My Best
This Is Painful
This Is Research
This Is Tedious
This Is Temporary
This Is Unfortunate
This Is Unnecessary
This Is Why
This Isn’t Cute
This lane is mine, fight me
This Might Work
This seemed like a good idea last night
This Wasn’t the Plan
Thought Process Unknown
Thoughts Pending
Thriving Adjacent
Thriving? Maybe Later
Tiny Human AF
Tiny Human Daily
Tiny Human Life
Tiny Human Mood
Tiny Human Problems
Tiny Patience
TIRED
Tired AF
TIRED AGAIN
Tired Alert
Tired Brain Overdrafted Soon
Tired Brain Suspended Sometimes
Tired But Cute
Tired But Functional
Tired But Functioning
Tired But Stylish
Tired But Stylish Today
Tired But Surviving
Tired Caution
Tired Caution Malfunctioning Mostly
Tired Caution Pending Eventually
Tired Chaos Expired Now
Tired Chaos Loading
Tired Drama Expired Soon
Tired Energy
Tired Energy Buffering
Tired Energy Definitely
Tired Energy Malfunctioning Forever
Tired Energy Overdrafted
Tired Energy Today
Tired Existential Crisis
Tired Forever
Tired Function Lagging
Tired Function Lagging Again
Tired Function Pending Always
Tired Inner Child Overdrafted
Tired Mind Incoming
Tired Mind Loading
Tired Mood Suspended Eventually
Tired Nap
Tired Nap Incoming Now
Tired Nap Incoming Seriously
Tired Nap Now
Tired Overthinking Offline Eventually
Tired Sarcasm Malfunctioning Definitely
Tired Sleep Glitching Today
Tired Soft Chaos Spiraling
Tired Vibe Pending Mostly
Tired Vibe Soon
Tired, Not Dead
Tired, Not Dead Yet
Too Aware
Too blessed to be stressed (actually super stressed)
Too cool for your lane
Too Tired
Too Tired Already
Too Tired For You
Too Tired To Care
Too Tired To Function
Too Tired To Talk
Too Weird Already
Too Weird Today
Totally Over It
Trial and Error
Trial Version
Trust Issues Detected
Trust Me I’m Confused
Trust Me Maybe
Trust the Guess
Trust the Process
TRY AGAIN
Try Again Later
Try Harder
Try Me AF
Try Me Alert
Try Me Daily
Try Me Life
Try Me Vibes
TRYING
Trying Again
Trying Lightly
Trying Slowly
Trying Softly
Unamused
Unamused AF
Unamused Alert
Unamused Forever
Unapologetic
Unapologetic AF
Unapologetic Daily
Unapologetic Life
Unapologetic Vibes
UNBOTHERED
Unbothered AF
Unbothered Alert
Unbothered Daily
Unbothered Life
Unbothered Mostly
Unbothered Vibes
Unbothered-ish
Uncertain But Moving On
Uncertain Confidence
Uncertain Energy
Uncertain Expertise
Uncertain Logic
Uncertain Outcome
Unclear But Confident
Unclear Direction
Unclear Intentions
Unclear Logic Path
Unclear Motivation
Unclear Payoff
Unclear Purpose
Unclear Results
Underachiever
Underthought It
Underwhelmed
Unemployed Spiritually
Unenthused
Unexpectedly Caution Suspended
Unexpectedly Chaos
Unexpectedly Chaos Crashing Always
Unexpectedly Chaos Glitching Definitely
Unexpectedly Energy
Unexpectedly Existential Crisis
Unexpectedly Existential Crisis Crashing Eventually
Unexpectedly Existential Crisis Malfunctioning
Unexpectedly Existential Crisis Offline
Unexpectedly Function Seriously
Unexpectedly Inner Child Suspended
Unexpectedly Mind Glitching
Unexpectedly Mind Loading
Unexpectedly Mood Brewing Always
Unexpectedly Nap Expired
Unexpectedly Overthinking Rising
Unexpectedly Sarcasm Eventually
Unexpectedly Sarcasm Loading
Unexpectedly Sarcasm Loading Eventually
Unexpectedly Sarcasm Loading Now
Unexpectedly Sarcasm Rising Today
Unexpectedly Sleep Buffering
Unexpectedly Soft Chaos Glitching Definitely
Unexpectedly Soft Chaos Glitching Now
Unexpectedly Vibe Buffering Sometimes
Unexpectedly Vibe Crashing
Unfinished Business
Unfinished Thought
Unhinged But Polite
Unimpressed
Unintentional Outcome
Unmotivated
Unmotivated But Cute
Unmotivated Forever
Unmotivated Icon
Unplug Me
Unproven Concept
Unstable But Cute
Unstable Vibes
Unsupervised
Untested Brain
Untested Theory
Unverified Method
Vague Plans
Vibe Check
Vibe Error
Vibe Low
Vibe Not Included
Vibe Offline
Vibe Overload
Vibe Pending
Vibe Suspended
Vibe Suspended Again
Vibe: Malfunction
Vibe: Suspended
Vibes Are Taxed
Vibes Not Included
Vibes Only
Vibes Pending
Vibes: Suspended
WAITING
Warning: Chronic overthinker at wheel
Warning: Contains artificial intelligence and natural stupidity
Warning: Contains multitudes (mostly anxiety)
Warning: Contents under pressure
Warning: Daydreamer at wheel
Warning: Distracted driver
Warning: Driver has main character energy
Warning: Driver has main character syndrome
Warning: Driver is hangry
Warning: Driver may be dissociating
Warning: Driver may be having an existential crisis
Warning: Driver may spontaneously quote Office episodes
Warning: Driver powered by chaos and Red Bull
Warning: Driver running on spite
Warning: Driver singing show tunes badly
Warning: Driver stress-eating at all times
Warning: Driver vibing and thriving (barely)
Warning: May brake for imaginary obstacles
Warning: May cry at commercials but not real life
Warning: May cry at nothing and laugh at tragedy
Warning: May cry at wholesome content but nothing genuinely sad
Warning: May cry, laugh, or rage without warning
Warning: May cry-laugh at absolutely nothing or everything
Warning: May cry-laugh at inappropriate moments indefinitely
Warning: May cry-laugh at inappropriate times
Warning: May cry-laugh-rage simultaneously
Warning: May cry-laugh-scream in unexpected combinations
Warning: May forget to use turn signal (sorry)
Warning: May forget why I'm driving here
Warning: May honk accidentally while adjusting radio
Warning: May honk accidentally while gesturing
Warning: May honk accidentally while having an existential crisis
Warning: May honk accidentally while having feelings
Warning: May honk at my own driving decisions
Warning: May honk at my own existence
Warning: May honk at my own thoughts
Warning: May honk at own mistakes
Warning: May honk emotionally at random intervals
Warning: May honk emotionally without reason
Warning: May honk emotionally without warning or reason
Warning: May honk supportively at strangers
Warning: May honk supportively or aggressively (I don't know either)
Warning: May honk supportively or aggressively (unclear)
Warning: May need emotional support after this drive
Warning: May need emotional support at any moment
Warning: May need therapy after this commute
Warning: May need to pull over for emotional reasons
Warning: May parallel park across international borders
Warning: May parallel park across multiple zip codes
Warning: May parallel park across state lines
Warning: May parallel park across three spots
Warning: May parallel park eventually
Warning: May parallel park eventually (no guarantees)
Warning: May parallel park eventually (probably not)
Warning: May parallel park eventually (setting realistic expectations)
Warning: May parallel park eventually in this lifetime possibly
Warning: May parallel park eventually possibly never definitely maybe not
Warning: May parallel park eventually probably not definitely maybe
Warning: May parallel park eventually theoretically maybe someday
Warning: May parallel park in 47 attempts
Warning: May parallel park in a different time zone
Warning: May parallel park in a parallel universe
Warning: May parallel park in an alternate timeline
Warning: May parallel park in another dimension
Warning: May parallel park in another dimension entirely
Warning: May parallel park sometime this century
Warning: May parallel park sometime this lifetime maybe
Warning: May quote vines that are 10 years old
Warning: May reference ancient internet history
Warning: May reference books I haven't finished
Warning: May reference cultural moments from before I was born
Warning: May reference internet drama from 2014
Warning: May reference internet drama from the Paleolithic era
Warning: May reference internet history from the bronze age
Warning: May reference memes from 2012
Warning: May reference memes from the ancient times (2010)
Warning: May reference memes older than this car
Warning: May reference movies I've never actually seen
Warning: May reference obscure TV shows
Warning: May reference shows from before streaming existed
Warning: May reference shows I've never actually watched
Warning: May reference shows that were canceled in 2009
Warning: May reference things from 2003
Warning: May reference things that only I find funny
Warning: May reference TV shows from before you were born
Warning: May spontaneously burst into song (badly)
Warning: May spontaneously laugh-cry at nothing
Warning: May spontaneously need a mental health day
Warning: May spontaneously need a mental health decade
Warning: May spontaneously need a nap immediately
Warning: May spontaneously need emotional support immediately always
Warning: May spontaneously need therapy
Warning: May spontaneously need therapy, snacks, naps, or all three
Warning: May spontaneously need therapy, snacks, or both
Warning: May spontaneously need to process feelings immediately
Warning: May spontaneously need to rant about everything and nothing
Warning: May spontaneously need to scream into void
Warning: May spontaneously need to vent about everything
Warning: May spontaneously need to vent about everything simultaneously
Warning: May spontaneously need validation
Warning: May spontaneously quote memes
Warning: May spontaneously quote memes mid-conversation
Warning: May spontaneously start talking about dogs
Warning: May stop for coffee without notice
Warning: May stop for emotional processing without notice
Warning: May stop for emotional reasons at any time
Warning: May stop for snacks without announcing
Warning: May stop suddenly for random thoughts
Warning: May stop suddenly to pet every animal
Warning: May ugly cry at dog rescue videos exclusively
Warning: May ugly cry to commercials unironically
Warning: May ugly cry to feel-good content exclusively
Warning: May ugly cry to feel-good movies exclusively
Warning: May ugly cry to podcast episodes
Warning: May ugly cry to songs about nothing sad
Warning: May ugly laugh at own jokes
Warning: May ugly sing entire albums incorrectly
Warning: May ugly sing with aggressive confidence
Warning: May ugly sing with aggressive enthusiasm
Warning: May ugly sing with full confidence
Warning: May ugly sing with zero pitch awareness
Warning: May ugly sing with zero shame
Warning: May ugly sing with zero shame or talent
Warning: Objects in car are more depressed than they appear
Warning: Sarcasm loading... please wait
Warning: Sarcasm on board
Warning: Singing driver, save yourselves
Warning: Unpredictable behavior
Warning: Unstable driver
We’ll Adapt
We’ll Adjust
We’ll Fix It
We’ll See
Weird Brain Glitching
Weird Brain Mostly
Weird Brain Now
Weird Caution
Weird Caution Forever
Weird Caution Overdrafted Eventually
Weird Chaos
Weird Drama Probably
Weird Energy
Weird Energy Buffering
Weird Energy Buffering Probably
Weird Energy Expired
Weird Energy Incoming
Weird Existential Crisis Loading Sometimes
Weird Function Brewing
Weird Function Glitching Probably
Weird Function Rising
Weird Function Suspended Probably
Weird Inner Child
Weird Inner Child Brewing
Weird Inner Child Malfunctioning Definitely
Weird Inner Child Malfunctioning Probably
Weird Mind Lagging
Weird Mood Malfunctioning Seriously
Weird Mood Today
Weird Nap
Weird Nap Expired
Weird Overthinking Spiraling
Weird Sarcasm Lagging
Weird Sarcasm Probably
Weird Sleep Buffering
Weird Sleep Soon
Weird Soft Chaos Definitely
Weird Soft Chaos Expired Forever
Weird Vibe Mostly
Weird Vibe Seriously
Whatever
Whatever Forever
Whatever Happens Happens
Whatever Works
Why Bother
With Disappointment
With Everything
Work In Progress
WORKING
Working Assumption
Working Hypothesis
Working on It
Works In Theory
Yes, this is my car. No, I won't give you a ride
You can’t rush perfection
You’re close enough
Your driving terrifies me
Your horn makes me happy
Your hurry is irrelevant
Your road rage fuels me
Your road rage is showing
Zero Accountability
Zero Ambition
Zero Brain
Zero Brain Expired Forever
Zero Brain Sometimes
Zero Brain Spiraling
Zero Brain Suspended
Zero Caution Buffering
Zero Chaos Buffering
Zero Chaos Definitely
Zero Chaos Malfunctioning Probably
Zero Chill
Zero Chill AF
Zero Chill Alert
Zero Chill Club
Zero Chill Daily
Zero Chill Icon
Zero Chill Life
Zero Chill Mode
Zero Chill Remaining
Zero Chill Today
Zero Chill Vibes
Zero Chill Zone
Zero days without sarcasm
Zero Drama
Zero Drama Probably
Zero Effort Alert
Zero Effort Given
Zero Energy
Zero Energy Lagging
Zero Energy Sometimes
Zero Enthusiasm
Zero Existential Crisis Lagging Definitely
Zero Existential Crisis Offline Eventually
Zero Existential Crisis Probably
Zero Fucks
Zero Fucks Today
Zero Function Brewing Probably
Zero Inner Child
Zero Inner Child Buffering
Zero Inner Child Loading Forever
Zero Inner Child Offline Sometimes
Zero Inner Child Pending
Zero Interest
Zero Mind Pending
Zero Mind Spiraling Sometimes
Zero Mood Buffering
Zero Mood Buffering Definitely
Zero Mood Overdrafted
Zero Mood Rising Definitely
Zero Motivation
Zero Motivation Club
Zero Motivation Hero
Zero Motivation Hero 2
Zero Motivation Pending
Zero Motivation Zone
Zero Nap Buffering Mostly
Zero Nap Incoming Definitely
Zero Nap Overdrafted
Zero Overthinking Expired Soon
Zero Overthinking Lagging
Zero Overthinking Offline Eventually
Zero Patience
Zero Patience AF
Zero Patience Alert
Zero Patience Club
Zero Patience Daily
Zero Patience Life
Zero Patience Mode
Zero Patience Remaining
Zero Patience Vibes
Zero Sarcasm Sometimes
Zero Sarcasm Soon
Zero Sleep
Zero Sleep Always
Zero Sleep Brewing
Zero Sleep Expired Today
Zero Sleep Rising Sometimes
Zero Soft Chaos Buffering Sometimes
Zero Soft Chaos Expired Probably
Zero Soft Chaos Forever
Zero Soft Chaos Pending
Zero Vibe
Zero Vibe Loading Always